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Nation Longs for Return to Normalcy of Constant Worrying About Death Virus Trump Adds Peyote to Regimen, Questions Reporter's Existence
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Trump: US Death Toll Less than 3% Vietnamese Dead in War
Dr. Fauci Urges Americans to Sexually Self-Gratify
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First Coronavirus Vaccine Fails to Cause Autism
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Racist Make-A-Wish Boy Realizes Dream of Shooting Black Man
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FDA Head Eric Trump Touts New Un-Inactivated COVID-19 Vaccine
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Seance: 63 of Trump's Aborted Children Also Pro-Life
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9 Dead After Police Mistake White Shooter's Gun for Banana
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Plucky Band of Racist Children Start Work on Border Wall
As tensions continue to build between protestors and the police over the death of George Floyd two weeks ago, many across the nation find themselves yearning for the recent simpler times of only having to constantly worry about contracting COVID-19. "It seems like just yesterday my only worry in life other than losing my job and becoming homeless was the possibility of catching a death virus that would suffocate the life out of me. Those were the days," one man pined. Indeed, while the... (More)
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Man Discovers He is 98% Douchebag on Ancestry.com
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Charlotte Zoo Encouraging Patrons to Harass Gay Penguins

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Opinion
Ooh! Look at My Son, the Big Shot President! - By: Fred Trump - Oh, hey everybody! If it isn't my son Donald, the big shot President! Just look at him, sitting at his big, important desk in his big, snazzy Oval Office in his big, fancy White House. Whoop-dee doo! President Trump! Who would've guessed... (More)
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Take Your Huddled Masses and Shove 'Em - By: The Statue of Liberty - Take your tired and your poor, your huddled masses, yada, yada, yada, and shove 'em. Let them be poor and miserable somewhere else. Fuck off. Country's full. I know what my stupid plaque says. I don't care... (More)

Kochs Offset Gates Foundation with $550 Billion Donation to Evil

Man Protesting Death of Man Beaten to Death by Police Beaten to Death by Police

Love Thy Neighbor as Thy Love Thyself - Unless Thy Neighbor is a Fag - By: Jerry Wallingford - As commanded by the books of Moses and recorded in Mark 12:28-34, I believe that one should love thy neighbor as thy love thyself, unless of course thy neighbor is a fag... (More)



 
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