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Poll: Sharks, Batteries Top Issues Ahead of November Election Florida Sun, Rain Conspire to Turn Kids Gay
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A national poll released by the Pew Research Center reveals that sharks and batteries top the list of issues facing the nation this election year. The survey, which also found that what Cary Grant looks like in a bathing suit is weighing heavily on voters' minds, appears to validate former President Trump's recent focus on such matters. "If I'm on a boat that's sinking because the battery is too heavy, and there's a shark like ten yards away, then yeah, I want to know whether I should jump or not," one voter said. Trump, who shared at a Las Vegas rally that he would, 'Take... (More)

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We Can Always Vote this Hitler Fellow Out in Another Four Years - By: Hanz Voller - With the 1932 election fast approaching, the German people will soon have the opportunity to decide whether to re-elect "Puffy" Paul von Hindenburg or opt for real change by casting their ballot for... (More)
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As a Proud Patriot, I Will Sacrifice Nothing for My Country - By: J.T. Bell - Freedom, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. These are the three pillars upon which America rests elevated above all others. They are the foundation for what makes this country the greatest in the history of mankind... (More)

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Man Protesting Death of Man Beaten to Death by Police Beaten to Death by Police

Take Your Huddled Masses and Shove 'Em - By: The Statue of Liberty - Take your tired and your poor, your huddled masses, yada, yada, yada, and shove 'em. Let them be poor and miserable somewhere else. Fuck off. Country's full. I know what my stupid plaque says. I don't care... (More)

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