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Markets > |
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| DOE Introduces Controversial New "Just the Tip" Sex Ed Campaign |
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• Charlie Rose Joins All Creepy News Network |
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DOW |
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• Hero Stops Lave Flow with Assault Rifle |
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• Giuliani Acknowledges NDA Between Trump, Corgi |
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• Rand Paul Beaten by Other Neighbor |
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• NRA: US Still Trails Syria, Afghanistan in Mass Shootings |
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Can Super 8 be Converted to DVD |
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Custom essay writers for hire online |
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• Trump Sends Family of Fallen Green Beret 6-Foot Party Sub |
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• Man Discovers He is 98% Douchebag on Ancestry.com |
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• Navy Launches First Gay Submarine |
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• Gitmo Prisoner One Butt Fucking Away from Revealing Key Intel |
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Responding to reports showing lowering birth rates across the nation, the Department of Education is rolling out a controversial new campaign titled "Just the Tip" that tells teens that it's okay to engage in unprotected sex for brief periods of time. "Absolute abstinence remains the fundamental policy of the government, but in the interest of honest disclosure, it's incumbent upon us to acknowledge to kids who choose to have sex that they can engage in coitus without consequence as long as it's 'just... (More)
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• 9 Dead After Police Mistake White Shooters Yellow Gun for Banana |
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• Charlotte Zoo Encouraging Patrons to Harass Gay Penguins |
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Opinion |
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 Ooh! Look at My Son, the Big Shot President! - By: Fred Trump - Oh, hey everybody! If it isn't my son Donald, the big shot President! Just look at him, sitting at his big, important desk in his big, snazzy Oval Office in his big, fancy White House. Whoop-dee doo! President Trump! Who would've guessed... (More) |
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 Take Your Huddled Masses and Shove 'Em - By: The Statue of Liberty - Take your tired and your poor, your huddled masses, yada, yada, yada, and shove 'em. Let them be poor and miserable somewhere else. Fuck off. Country's full. I know what my stupid plaque says. I don't care... (More) |
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 Kochs Offset Gates Foundation with $550 Billion Donation to Evil |
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 Man Protesting Death of Man Beaten to Death by Police Beaten to Death by Police |
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 Love Thy Neighbor as Thy Love Thyself - Unless Thy Neighbor is a Fag - By: Jerry Wallingford - As commanded by the books of Moses and recorded in Mark 12:28-34, I believe that one should love thy neighbor as thy love thyself, unless of course thy neighbor is a fag... (More)
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