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Bill Cosby Implicated in Planned Parenthood Baby Farm

The scandal surrounding Bill Cosby's alleged history of sexual misconduct grew exponentially today after the comedian was implicated in the operation of a recently discovered baby farm run by Planned Parenthood.

According to victims liberated from the clandestine organ and stem cell harvesting facility in rural Oregon, the disgraced Cosby was a frequent visitor to the site, inseminating many of the kidnapped women there through forced sex for the purpose of cultivating the resulting pregnancies for the baby's brains and spinal fluid.

"There's big money in baby brains and stem cells," FBI spokesman Tyler Gerhardt remarked. "This was a multi-billion dollar enterprise, with which Mr. Cosby appears to have played a significant role."

Exclusively white women between the ages of 16 and 32, the victims were reportedly transported to the compound after either being drugged during routine gynecological exams or taken from their homes late at night in scenarios designed to resemble alien abductions.

"A space ship and several costumes were discovered at the facility to corroborate these claims," Gerhardt said.

Once at the facility, the womens' temperatures were monitored daily by Planned Parenthood technicians, who would only remove them from their cramped cells once a month during their ovulations to be taken to special fertilization chambers where they would be forcefully violated either by Cosby or a large black probe.

"The women would be repeatedly impregnated in this way, after which their unborn children would be aborted after 6 months and subsequently butchered," noted Gerhardt.

Bill Cosby could not be reached for comment on this story.

 
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