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Tabouli Protestors Demand End to Leader's 192-Year Reign
A surge of political unrest continued its sweep through the Middle East as massive crowds assembled in cities across Tabouli today to demand an end to Baba Ghanoush's 192-year reign.
Numbering in the tens of thousands, protestors in Tabouli's capital city of Hummus waved Taboulian flags and mocked plastic skeletons in effigy of the Middle East nation's reviled ruler.
President Obama echoed the Tabouli people's cries by calling for Ghanoush to step down, heralding an end to nearly two centuries of tacit American support for Ghanoush's regime.
Noted for his remorseless, autocratic rule and eccentric behavior, the 221 year-old Ghanoush's authority has never been seriously challenged - even despite his purportedly not uttering a word in over 140 years.
"Baba Ghanoush simply exudes power. Words are not necessary," Tabouli Interior Minister remarked during Ghanoush's 47th successful re-election campaign in 2009.
Many of those who have gotten close to him over the years say Ghanoush exudes something else.
"The man stinks," President Warren Harding famously stated after meeting with Ghanoush in 1922, "But he gets the job done."
Taboulian opposition parties point to reports that Ghanoush has siphoned an estimated $500 trillion from his nation's economy while its citizens struggle to survive off an average of 3 cents a year as ways Ghanoush has failed his people.
Still others claim Ghanoush is mentally ill, citing his obsessive infatuation with the movie "Space Camp", which he has seen over 10,000 times, and his penchant for using worms as fashion accessories.
"There are a million reasons Ghanoush should step down – it is pointless to name them all," remarked International Muslim Association spokesman Hassan Abdul-Haleem, "The time for freedom for well-positioned Islamic fundamentalist Tabouli men is now."
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