Sarah Palin Reality Show "Alaskan Wildlife Holocaust" Debuts on TLC

Former Governor, Vice Presidential candidate, memoirist and Fox News commentator Sarah Palin's reality-based show "Alaskan Wildlife Holocaust" debuted to rancorous controversy and record-breaking ratings for its host Discovery Company network TLC last night.

Promoted as TV's "First Non-Politically Correct Nature Show", AWH's premiere episode opens with a bang as, appearing amidst the picturesque beauty of a lush Alaskan woodland, a battle fatigue bedecked Palin rolls a hand grenade down the hole of a fox's den. Seconds later, a disoriented, blood soaked creature hobbles out the other end, eliciting a barrage of automatic gunfire from the M16 Palin wields with surprising accuracy, tearing the animal to shreds.

"Come get some!" Palin shouts, announcing the show's unofficial catchphrase.  

Alaskan Wildlife Holocaust's jarring title sequence follows. Set to Drowning Pool's "Let the Bodies Hit the Floor", the 30 second lead-in depicts Palin killing upwards of one hundred animals, including wolves machine-gunned from helicopters and caged brown bears detonated with high explosives.

"How can you shoot baby wolves?" inquires a presumably concerned witness of the airborne slaughter at the conclusion of the opening credits.

"Easy, you just don't lead 'em as much," Palin says with a wink and a cluck of her tongue.

A spokesperson for the Discovery Company reported that Alaskan Wildlife Holocaust's debut generated more than 10,000 calls of complaint from viewers upset over several scenes ranging from segments that featured Palin setting landmines along migratory routes used by caribou to one in which she inserts a dead marmot's penis into its own mouth as, "A message to all the other son of a bitch marmots out there."

"The show had some really beautiful imagery of Alaska, but I could have done without all the killing," griped one viewer, "The part of the show with all the seals sunning themselves and frolicking on the beach, for instance. Was it really necessary to call in an artillery strike? They couldn't just film the seals and move along?"

Added the woman: "And how could she tell the seals were gay?"