Taylor Hicks Announces Plans for Summer Suicide Attempt

Taylor Hicks has announced plans to try to kill himself sometime during the Summer months.

The former American Idol winner and centerpiece of many 'Where are they now?' themed programs revealed on his blog that he is looking forward to ending it all by this September, "God willing".

"Don't know how I'll do it yet. I hear carbon monoxide is a pretty painless way to go. Either that or I'll stab myself in the neck," Hicks wrote on his new blog TaylorHicksSucks.org.

Hicks's announcement that he intends to kill himself this Summer has triggered a flurry of questions from people who want to know why he would wait so long, and who he is again.

Said one man: "Whether or not the guy kills himself is his own business. What I'm wondering is what he's going to do with all his stuff, and whether I can have some of it."

Most recently, conspiracy theorists have begun to warn that Hicks's proclaimed intention to take his own life is likely either a cruel hoax or a desperate cry for attention for the release of some shitty album.