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Global Fashion Crisis Worsens as Olivia Jade Remains MIA from Vlogosphere

The fashion crisis that has gripped the planet since social media influencer Olivia Jade Giannulli last vlogged weeks ago appears to be growing worse by the day.

According to many who know fashion but not nearly as well as Olivia Jade, the world's collective sense of style has degenerated precipitously following Giannulli's self-imposed exile amidst the college admissions scandal enveloping her family.

"It started with a lot of mid-accessorizing. You'd see a girl wearing a two-tone scarf with a patterned handbag and be like, 'Mmkay'; but before long people stopped being able to even match colors properly. My boss came to work yesterday in a red turtleneck and off-white pants and I was like, 'Wow'," one woman remarked.

According to correspondents living near the coasts, especially impacted has been people's beachwear savvy - an area of particular expertise for Olivia Jade, whose try-on vlogs had become an invaluable resource for people looking to make a splash at the shore.

"I got a sarong in the mail from Amazon yesterday, and honestly, I don't know what to do with it," one girl confessed. "Do I drape it around my shoulders? Do I wear it like some kind of hat?"

"Please come back, Olivia Jade! We need you!" the girl plead.

 
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